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Dena "smiley" Roberts

The New Me
They say the old me died
Now theres a new me
How could that be?
All I got was a bump on the head
How could the old me be dead?

I come home from the hospital
Walk into my home
I felt so alone
The walls were pink
I had to blink.
Who painted that color on the walls?
How could it be it was the old me.
Time to get a new color
The pink makes me sick.

I can hear the clock tick
As time passes by
But wait there are some things I dont remember
I just wanna cry.

My boy is gonna be two
They say no hes gonna be three
How could that be?
Where did the years go?
His birthdays are gone
I dont remember them
I feels so ashamed
Should I be to blame?
They say no
You took a hard blow.

I would rather be with kids
They dont see the new me
Adults can just let me be
Where did the old me go?
I really need to know

My counselor says write the old me a letter saying good bye
Tell me its a lie
She wants me to grieve
But how can I when I dont believe

Things are so much harder
Like sticking up for myself,
Making the memory work
I feel like such a jerk

If this is the new me
Then I will make a plea
To the all mighty God above
To try to love the new me.

Dena Roberts